Tag: Friendship

Standing on the mountain top.

On By Peggy BereIn Musings8 Comments

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I’ve always had a beef with New Year’s.  Not the actual Eve or Day, exactly.  But all the other hoopla that surrounds it.  There’s that depressing song for starters. It’s so bittersweet. As if you’re supposed to reflect on the could have beens, instead of the thank God there was’s. And then the expectations. Oh, the expectations!

My normal new year routine is to go to the mall when the holidays die down and shop for bargains with the other 2 billion people out there looking for bargains.  I bundle up in a lightweight outfit (because lord knows the malls are steaming hot and between that and my menopause, I tend to sweat ) and fight the traffic and the weather and head out.

Because I usually get all kinds of nifty kitchen gadgets and candles and lotions from Clark and the kids, (which I LOVE!) I tend to veer towards the women’s clothing department.  Last year (and the year before that and the year before that) I learned a valuable lesson.

I went to the mall (surprise, surprise!).   I didn’t need anything, but of course that wasn’t the point. One of my favorite stores was having a “70% off everything in the store!” sale.  I shopped myself silly and avoiding the glare of other shoppers waiting in the dressing room line behind me,  I stepped in with loads of bargains piled high in my arms.

It wasn’t long before I realized that none of the clothes I chose, fit. I tried on a red dress two sizes too small and stared in the mirror.

Wow, my mom was right! Red really IS my color!! I guess it’s kind of tight, but, it’s still a great price.  I could wear this, Yeah! …Or maybe…maybe in May for Mother’s Day it’ll fit…

I closed my eyes.

Stop.  Just, Stop.

There’s some insistent force that tells us buying our goal weight outfit will make us feel better, when in fact all it does is make us feel like a pile of crumbled up rice cakes and diet seltzer.

I was 50-something years old, and there was a lesson I needed to finally take to heart.

Dress for the body you have today.

I carefully lined up the five tops, one dress, and two pairs of pants that didn’t fit. In another pile, I placed the one top and one dress that did. I took a deep breath and headed for the register. With only two items.

And yet, in 2016, I want to learn to finally and forever learn to live a healthy lifestyle.  I want to lose 20 pounds, instead of celebrating the thousand (this might be a slight exaggeration) I’ve already lost. In 2016, I want to celebrate all of the blessings I’ve been graced with in my life.  In 2016 I want to remember that beauty is skin deep and that it’s what’s inside that truly counts.

So I’ve got this fab idea! Maybe instead of focusing on our shortcomings in 2016, why not stand on the mountain top and send echos off into the distance that we are fabulous – Just.The.Way.We.Are.   Sound good?

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Facebook – Do you overshare?

On By Peggy BereIn Musings33 Comments

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This week on Facebook, I ran across a post that made me chuckle to myself.  It was  a cleverly written piece of satire pointing out just how absurd we’ve all become with oversharing our lives on social-media.  (Satire – a genre of literature or writing in which vices, follies, abuses, and shortcomings are held up to ridicule, ideally with the intent of shaming individuals.)

I showed it to Clark.  He chuckled.  I showed it to my friends.  They chuckled.  I showed it to my kids and they chuckled.  In conversations all week, I mentioned it to my friends and acquaintances.  Everyone chuckled.  And, everyone commented similarly.  Well, that certainly isn’t me.  I don’t overshare on Facebook.  At least not to the point of  Ad Nauseum…….. (ad nau·se·am (ăd nô′zē-əm) adv. To a disgusting or ridiculous degree; to the point of nausea)

That same thought ran through my mind.  That certainly doesn’t apply to meeee…. Or, does it? (millisecond of doubt)….. Nah.  So what.  So my Facebook page is covered with massive amounts of selfies.   And, updates on what I’m doing & where you can find me most hours of most days.   Just because I’ve posted 52 photo’s of my dog in the past few months, all basically in the same position with the same look on his face, that doesn’t really mean I’ve share too much.  (He’s sooooo cute!)

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It’s not like I’m one of those overbearing new parents who lets us know the exact moment of conception or what the baby looks like in the womb.

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And, thank the Lord above that I was never one of those people who shared TMI about bodily functions…

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But in all fairness, I not only have the link to Facebook bookmarked on the front page of my PC,  but also on the first page of my smartphone – which is like the speed dial of the social media world!!   This gives me instant access to being *spring into action* ready to post something I find incredibly interesting.  Like, a picture of what’s sitting in front of me on my lunch plate.  Or, quoting some incredibly humorous comment that came out of one of my kids mouths.

This weekdislike, Facebook announced the unveiling of it’s new *thumbs down* dislike button.  I’m not really sure how I feel about this.  While it’s true that not every post on the social-media site always seems deserving of a virtual thumbs up, do we really want to make it easier to spread negativity online?  Don’t we do enough of that in real life?  Isn’t Social-Media the place we turn to when we want to share with everyone how absolutely (and a little unrealistically) fabulous our lives are?

What will mom’s everywhere do when they find a big ‘ol thumbs down on the posted picture of Jr.   Or, when someone gives us a thumbs down on the photo of the tuna fish sammie on our plate.  What if someone decides to tell me that they DON”T think my dog is deserving of the last 40 pictures I’ve posted of him.  (thank goodness for the *unfriend* button.)  It shall be interesting!

Until then, my Facebook page will remain discreet and humble.  Like always.  And I imagine yours will, too.

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Where’s your happy place?

On By Peggy BereIn Musings38 Comments

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We’ve all been there.  You wake up in the morning and feel somewhat stiff and sore.  The Flu?  A cold coming on?  Some kind of illness that you’re sure will keep you from leaving your bedroom all day, let alone your home.  Your mind starts to clear from the hazy slumber you just woke up from and then you remember.  YOGA!!

I was going to become a yoga guru in the new year.  My resolution – become more in tuned with my body while nourishing it through the ancient art of yoga.  Great idea?  Yes, I thought so!

In my mind, Yoga was stretching and a light, relaxing form of exercise.  I could wear something fashionable and cute and not even break a sweat while getting into amazingly sculpted shape.  It would benefit both my mind and body.  And, my friend and I could not wait to get started.  One of my bestie’s and I signed up for a 10 week beginners yoga course.  It was all set for Saturday mornings.  Ten in a row.  We’d be fit and fabulous in no time at all.

We agreed to start the first Saturday of the New Year.  Oops.  That was Superbowl weekend.  OK, we’d start the 2nd weekend.  After all, what was one more weekend of indulgence after a long holiday season with no regard to nutrition or health whatsoever?

So off I went on the designated start day.  I drove to the trendy yoga studio, feeling quite smug, looking around at the other drivers on the road at this early morning hour on a weekend.  I wondered where they were going.  Well, they weren’t going to yoga like I was.  Ha!  One point for me!

I walked in with my fancy, new, Costco discount yoga mat slung around my back like all the young girls I saw.  I was ready to get my Yoga on.  I had beat my friend to the class so I signed in with the bright pen that was decorated with a big daisy on the end of it.  Very groovy!   I turned and headed towards the sheer fabric panels that I saw hanging from the ceiling.  They acted as a divider between the front reception area and the actual studio.  I walked through them and entered the studio area.

Looking around, I noticed that the room was not as big as I imagined it would be.  It was actually a little tight on space.  There were yoga mats laying all over the place in random order.  The air smelled warm and damp from the previous class that had just got done.  I turned towards the back of the room and found a space in the corner of the crowded room. I unrolled my mat and plopped down on it.  I saved the space next to me for my friend who had still not arrived.  Everyone around me was stretching and warming up.  I decided to do the same.  The girl next to me was sitting crossed legged and bending over her thighs.  She was folded  almost in half, so low that her forehead almost touched the ground.  OK!  I’ll do that, too.  I mimicked my neighbors position and tried to bend down. I didn’t get very far.  I don’t even think I got halfway down.  I was stuck in an almost 90 Degree angle.  I used to be so flexible.  When did this happen? 

I heard my friend’s voice as she entered the studio and waved her over to me.  We were next to each other on our mats, looking around at all the others bending their lithe figures this way and that.  We decided to just chat about how great we looked in our new workout gear until the instructor got started.  Don’t we look great?!  Yes, we do! 

The instructor walked in, dimmed the lights low and got started.  The people all around me had their socks off to prevent slippage.  I kept mine on.  I had not thought ahead.  If I took my socks off everyone would see my 2 month old pedicure that had grown out almost midway to the tips of my toes.  It was chipping and peeling.  Who knew anyone besides my hubby would be seeing my toes during the snowy, winter months?  Mental note: get pedicure before next class. 

We warmed up with a few easy poses.  OK!  simple.  I could handle this.  No sweat!  But after about 10 minutes, things started to get a bit sticky.  We were bending ourselves in all kind of unnatural positions.  We were doing planks.  And, doing Ab work.  My abs had not had a relationship with an exercise, well, since I had my kids 20 years earlier.  I was starting to sweat.  I could see the perspiration droplets starting to show through my new, trendy workout gear. The instructor had earlier told us to work with our eyes closed and at our own pace.  I opened mine and peeked over at my friend.  She was dabbing the sweat off of her brow, too…  dab dab dab.. The instructor caught me looking around the room and reiterated that nobody should worry about anybody else’s performance level.  But how could I not notice and be amazed at the little skinny thing in front of me.  She had her ankle behind her neck.  Good Lord, It was like something straight out of Ripley’s Believe it or Not.  I looked at my friend again and she was silently mouthing something to me…. these poses are humanly unnatural…  I nodded and agreed.  I could hear pops from different parts of my body and prayed that I wouldn’t throw anything out of joint.

After 55 minutes of putting our poor, out of shape bodies through torture and hell, we finally got to the cool down.

Ahhhh.  Now this I could handle.  Granted, we were just lying there sweaty on the mats – silently.  Eyes closed, hands at our sides, palms facing upwards.  My heartbeat began to return to normal.  My sweating slowed down from a steady flow to a little drip. The instructors soothing voice washed over us.  There was quiet music playing in the background, swirling around my brain.  I had actually become relaxed.  I had gone from challenging my body like it had not been challenged in a long time to extreme relaxation.  All in a matter of five minutes.    As the entire class lay there silently she made us aware of all of our senses.  Moving from one muscle group to the next.  It felt like heaven.  In a way, it was spiritual.  She told us to let our breathing return to normal. To concentrate only on going to a place in our hearts and mind that made us happy.  A beach.  A recent or long ago vacation.  A memory.  It could be anywhere.  Or with anyone.

I was sitting on a large tourist bus in a seat next to my mom.  We were perched up high over the road.  Traveling through the countryside of Italy on our way to Rome.  We were traveling with a choir group from one of my girlfriend’s church. She had invited us to come along.  There were extra seats available. It was my Mom’s and My first trip to Italy.  A place where we had both always wanted to go.  And, we did.  My mind remembered that the choir on the bus was singing.  They were practicing the hymns and church songs that they were going to sing in Churches along the way.  It was beautiful.  My memory shifted over to my My mom and I looking out the window at the rolling hills of Tuscany.  We saw tall trees all around us.  Those tall, pine-like ones that are so familiar to the Italian region.  The ones I had seen in books and magazines all of my life.  The houses were different.  Stucco with tiled roofs.  There was livestock, mostly sheep, roaming around.  Our bus chugged along silently through the countryside over the hills.  It looked simple. And lovely.  My mom and I were talking all along the way.  We were sitting arm in arm.  And, we were laughing.  Remembering experiences from the night before in Florence.  A restaurant that stayed opened for us during the traditional Italian siesta time.  The opened bottle of Limoncello sitting on our table  Bottle’s of Italian red wine.  Our new friends sitting across from us.  We did not know them before we boarded the plane in Chicago.  Now?  We were close with them.  And, traveling across central Europe with them.  A bond had been formed.   It was soothing and it was the happy place that my heart had gone to for that moment…..

 

And then, suddenly, the instructor invaded my happy place.  I was back in the present.  With my dear yoga buddy next to me.  We were told to sit in an upright position and show the sign of thankfulness.  Hands held in front of you.  In a praying position. She told us to take with us something good for the rest of the day.  Something that will make us shine, inside and out.  To remember why we had come in the first place.  Why we had walked through the door.  That we were there for a reason and not out of randomness.  And, she was right.

We had made a pact to better our minds and body in the new year.  And now that I had been through the challenges of the first class and the spirituality of the cool down, I knew this was the place for me.  I wanted to come back again.  And, again.

 

Namasté

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Who is that behind the bushes?

On By Peggy BereIn Musings16 Comments

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Reading this article this morning, originally printed in Deadstate.org, made me think of how wonderful it would be for those of us who have a love for all things photographic, to have the freedom and courage to simply walk up to any subject head on and do what we love to do most – Interact, fully engaged, with the group of people or person that drew our creative attention in their direction in the first place.  Face to face.  Not from around a corner or hidden behind a tree.  Not from a safe spot, hidden in the middle of some shrubbery.  Not from the subject’s backside (good grief, how boring!!)  And, most definitely not while pretending to take a picture of something over the subjects shoulder.  I mean, c’mon people! – I think everyone is on to that tactic.

I’ve gone through several steps of uncomfortable growth to get to the point I am now in my (very) amateur photography hobby.  I’m still not completely where I want to be in learning to just *go for the shot.* I tend to end up feeling squeamishly uncomfortable and as tho I’ve somehow invaded someone’s invisible bubble of privacy.  But I’m getting there.  One day I hope to feel comfortable enough to walk up to anyone, anywhere and take the shot.  I just might end up with some amazing captures like these!

In 1974 a photographer met two mimes, only years later realizes who one of them was

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Back in 1974, photographer Daniel Sorine came across two mimes in New York City’s Central Park. Something about them caught his eye, and he immediately began to snap pictures.

Years later, Sorine realized that one of the mimes was a then-unknown Robin Williams and the other was author Todd Oppenheimer.

 

“What attracted me to Robin Williams and his fellow mime, Todd Oppenheimer, was an unusual amount of intensity, personality and physical fluidity. When I approached them with my Pentax Spotmatic they allowed me to invite them into my camera instead of me having to chase after them.”

take a look:

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It’s hard to know if these amazing shots of a young Robin Williams were captured because the photographer was confidant enough to simply walk up to his subject and shoot the picture or if it was simply a matter of Robin’s big personality, generosity and love of attention.  But, I do know, that you have to step out from behind the bushes.

 

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Why women need women in their lives

On By Peggy BereIn Musings67 Comments

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It was a Thursday Morning.  The first Thursday of the New Year.  That meant that I would be meeting up with one of my besties for coffee.    We made a pact last year to meet up once a week at the coffee shop that sits midway between her suburb and mine.   Thursday mornings, that was the day we agreed upon.  They would be our day!!  Regardless of weather.  Regardless of schedules.  And, we stuck to our deal.  Last year we met every single Thursday except for one or two.   The only thing that keeps us away from our sacred get-together is if one of us is out-of-town.  That’s a reasonable excuse.

She always arrives before I do.  And, there is usually an empty “to go” cup waiting for me.  Her treat.  We buy the “to go” cups because this particular spot lets you refill your java as many times as you’d like and then take one with you *to go* if you’d like.  And we do.

I have tried endlessly, unsuccessfully, to beat her to our spot so that I can treat her for coffee just once.  But every week, regardless of how early I get ready in the morning and rush out the door, she is sitting there already.  Waiting.  Enthusiastically.

Our first Thursday of the new year!!  I was ready to get back on track with a normal routine.  I was burned out on the holidays and all of the socializing that comes along with the hectic, jolly season.  I was ready to get back into my regular routine.  I was happy to be up and out the door early and on my way to meet up with my sweet friend. We were going to discuss our new Yoga class we were enrolled in on Saturday mornings!!  Hurray!!

As I pulled into the parking lot I noticed her car right away.  Of courseeee she would be there before me!   I walked in and turned my attention to one of the two spots that we usually sit in.  And, there she was.  Big, bright reddish bouffant, smiling eyes and a huge grin.  *over here!!*  She always stands up when she spots me walking in and waves her arm enthusiastically back and forth – as If I would not be able to find her unless she stood up and signaled me.  Ohhh, my dear, sweet friend must not be aware that I can see her big, beautiful bouffant over the top of the booth from across the room whether or not she stands up to greet me.

I made a beeline for the booth and sat down.  She had papers and a schedule in front of her and was ready to dive into the details of our new Yoga class.  I scooted into the booth across from her and looked at the coffee and water sitting in front of me.  She had put a slice of lemon in my water.  Everybody knows that lemons help to flush out all the millions of calories and impurities that we tend to shove into our bodies over the holidays.  Every little bit counts!!  And, if we can lose weight just by drinking lemon water, bring it on!!

We were all settled in and ready to get to the gabbing.  She looked up at me and immediately knew that something was a little off.  Women do that.  We have a special, ingrained sense of female esp.  We can tell when one of our girlfriends are upset about something.  She asked me what was wrong and I burst into tears.  I had been thinking about my Mom on the way to the coffee shop.  About how desperately I missed her.  My heart-felt such a heavy weight that morning.  I knew that this time of year was a trigger.  The anniversary – the first anniversary of her passing was just around the corner.  It was all too much to bear.

My bestie popped up and went to get some makeshift Kleenex (scratchy paper napkins).  She handed them to me and scooted back in the booth.  I took them and held them up to my face.  I was covering my face with them and blubbering.  I was hiding behind them.  She told me to put them down.  That she knew I was back there behind the scratchy napkin crying.  I thought to myself, that comment was something my Mom would have laughed about.   And as I thought about my Mom laughing at a comment like that, I began to laugh, myself.  I laughed for a minute and then cried some more.  It was the ugly cry where your face is all skewed up.  But then I thought about my friend telling me that she knew I was behind the napkin and my emotions turned into a half laugh half cry.  I lowered my scratchy shield an inch and looked at her through watery, drowned eyes from over the top.  She didn’t seem to be phased that I was making a scene.  So I chanced lowering the napkin all the way down and looked her straight in the eye.  And, went on to unload my soul to her.  Like I had so many times in the past year.  She sat there and listened as I unloaded my grieving sorrow to her.  She had all the right things to say.  All the while, reaching across the table and holding my hand.  And after about 10- 15 minutes, I felt so much better.  I pulled myself together, we smiled at each other.  It had passed.  Unloading on her was like a weight being lifted off my shoulders.  So, we went on to discuss how we were going to become Yoga Guru’s in 2015.  (Lord help us! )

I have always been aware of the fact that women need women in their lives.  Or, maybe it’s just me.  But I don’t think so.  I really do believe that women need women.  For socializing.  For nurturing.  For talking with.  We are strong and intelligent and loyal to each other.  We relate to one another and usually think along the same wavelengths.  I’m constantly amazed by my friends who seem to know when I need them. And, we are complicated.  Men, not so much.  Men are simple.  They can get along with a tv remote and a bag of snacks as their sidekicks.  I’m not sure if I envy that or not.  I just know that I have some amazing women in my life.  I have been blessed with an abundance of besties.  All good women to their core.

Our Thursdays have been a special blessing to me.  This past year would have been overwhelming without my girlfriends in my life.  I treasure each and every one of them.  And, I know just how blessed I am to have the company of so many amazing women on a day-to-day basis in my life.

My Mom was an amazing woman herself.  I miss her SO much.  I think about her everyday.  I will never stop missing her or feeling her void.  But with a little help from my girlfriends from time to time, I learn to smile over the memories I have rather than dwell on the pain.

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How to become a seasoned traveler

On By Peggy BereIn Margber, Musings48 Comments

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Hey!  It’s Summertime!!!   Time to take to the highways and sky-ways for travel.  Here are a few helpful tips on becoming a seasoned traveler.  You’re Welcome!

 

 Helpful Hints

 

  • Dramatically roll eyes when your fun friend suggests taking a weekend trip together while out having cocktails

  • Order another round of drinks

  • Jump on board

  • Discuss possible destinations with fun friend

  • Start small – possibly a road-trip to a neighboring state.

  • Pay the high tab from cocktails you’ve been having while discussing fun road-trip and decide to pin down destination soon.

  • Ignore work, chores, spouse, kids so you can obsess all week about where to go on fun girlfriends road trip

  • Decide a weekend is not long enough

  • Extend weekend trip to an extended long weekend road-trip.

  • Call fun friend at work to discuss extended long weekend road-trip details.

  • Scrap the idea of road-trip.  Decide to fly across the country

  • Look for good airfare

  • Pay exorbitant price for airfare

  • Book earliest flight of the day as not to miss a single minute of fun get-away.

  • Look for good hotel deal in a small, reasonably priced hotel.

  • Book a suite at a swanky hotel

  • Get disgusted at lack of weekend getaway outfits.

  • Go shopping for new wardrobe.

  • Sneak new wardrobe into house when hubby is away at work

  • Feel guilty

  • Hide new wardrobe in back of spare bedroom closet.

  • Call fun friend to discuss new weekend wardrobe

  • Get excited

  • Brilliantly decide to extend weekend road-trip to a week-long get away.  Hurray!

  • Go shopping for more clothes

  • Start obsessing about weather for fun girlfriend’s trip

  • Go shopping for comfy vacation walking shoes

  • Buy three pairs

  • Call fun friend and tell her about new, comfy walking shoes.

  • Check out vacation destination weather again

  • Worry about possible rain

  • Screw the rain.  Who cares!

  • Go shopping for new rain slicker and travel umbrella

  • Call fun friend and discuss new purchases.  And, weather.

  • Lug old suitcase up 2 weeks before trip and set it in corner of bedroom

  • Decide old suitcase is not good for fun getaway

  • Go shopping for new weekender bag

  • Call fun friend and tell her about new luggage

  • Check on vacation weather again

  • Start laying out clothes for fun girls getaway.

  • Call fun friend to ask what she is packing.

  • Over-pack

  • Unzip suitcase extender for extra room

  • Take a few things out of suitcase that you decide you don’t need.

  • Re-zip overstuffed suitcase

  • Have fun friend stay with you the night before leaving on fun friends getaway.

  • Check out vacation weather with fun friend.

  • Ask hubby to drive you to airport in the morning.

  • Worry about possible, heavy traffic on the way to airport.  And, the weather.

  • Set alarm clock for 3am to avoid being late for first flight out

  • Lug overstuffed, heavy suitcase down the stairs and out to waiting car.

  • Arrive at airport 2 hours early for first flight because there was no traffic.

  • Board airplane.

  • Get situated in seat and worry about who will be sitting with you in third open seat.

  • Avoid eye contact with boarding passengers

  • Pray for someone skinny.

  • Cough and pretend to have massive head cold as boarding passengers check out open seat.

  • Turn to fun friend in excitement as seat remains open.

  • Talk about weather at destination

  • Talk about all the fun you will have

  • Order a Bloody Mary from Flight attendant

  • Talk about how this will be the BEST TRIP EVER.

  • Land at destination.

  • Lug overstuffed suitcase out to cab

  • Wait in massively long cab line

  • Load heavy suitcase into trunk of cab

  • Swerve away from Airport and Off You Go!!

  • Arrive at Swanky Hotel.

  • Check into room.

  • Drop off luggage

  • HURRAY!   Have a GREAT fun friend getaway!!

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NYC or Bust

On By Peggy BereIn Margber, Musings35 Comments

 

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New York City!!  Planning a long weekend to NYC is no easy task.  Add to that the fact that you are heading off on this shindig with your sister and the task becomes an event.

I’ve always recognized the fact that the time leading up to a long weekend getaway or vacation is often just as exciting, if not more, than the actual vacation itself.  The spark is set off when the idea is first discussed ~ which is usually over cocktails or while already in the midst of a vacation!! WHOOOP!!!

I approached my sister with the idea of a weekend away in NYC.  It was long overdue.  We had never gone away together before.  Shame on us!!  We were in our 50’s.  Was this something that we seriously had never scratched off of our bucket list??  Time restraints, hectic schedules and of course, our kids, had always prevented us from just picking up and taking off for the weekend.  Well that was about to change.  NYC, here we come!!

two months before trip…..

Me:  What do you think about a trip to NYC?

Nancy:  When?

Me:  Soon, before summer and craziness.

Nancy:  I’m in!

 

Well,  that almost seemed too easy.   After many phone-calls back and forth and daily emails, we finally found ONE weekend that worked.  One weekend in the entire summer!  The dates were set.  We would go for a long weekend, Thurs – Sun.  And So, the excitement began.

6 weeks before trip….

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Me:  How do you feel about an early flight?

Nancy:  How early?

Me:  6am. That way we don’t lose the entire first day

Nancy:  I’m In!!

 

Alrighty then!!!  Flight booked.

Next up – Hotel accommodations.  Before I was married, I would stay in any old flea bag motel.  The Red Roof in on the corner was fine with me.  No room service?…No problem!  Carry my own luggage to my room?  No biggie!

Then I got married.  Clark had a different take on hotels than I did.  He liked top end accommodations. And so, I discovered Luxury Hotels. How did I ever travel before without those cushy robes and matching slippers?  The valets, the concierge service, the large marble bathrooms &  tubs.. (Thanks Clark!!)  And a Hotel Snob was born!!

 

Me:  Nancy, hotels are a bit pricey in NYC.

Nancy:  That’s fine. You’re the cruise director!!  Make all the plans and consider me along for the ride.

 

This was too good to be true!  She was, like, the best travel partner ever!!  And so, the hotel was booked.  A beautiful spot one block from the West entrance to Central Park. We were in the middle of the action!

We started planning our days out.  Since Nancy had never been to NYC before, the list of things to do were endless.  Even to seasoned travelers who had been to this huge, bustling city many times, there were endless possibilities of things to do and see.  I planned to take her to see all the usual touristy spots – Top of the Rock, Central Park, the Empire State Building, Grand Central Station, Ellis Island, Statue of Liberty, Little Italy, SoHo, Chelsea, The Dakota, Washington Park, Wall Stree.

We bought tickets for the theater – two plays!  We had a day planned to Walk the Brooklyn Bridge (Just like Miranda & Steve did in Sex in the City!!) We bought tickets for the 9-11 Memorial which was opening to the public the week we planned on being there – Oh What great timing!!!

But wait.  We had too much to do and so little time.  I didn’t even know if we HAD enough time to do everything on our list.  I looked over our list of activities and decided there was not one single item I could delete.  Soooooo…..

 

Me:  Nancy, what do you think about going an extra few days?

Nancy:  Will we be able to change our plane reservations and get the extra days in the hotel?

Me:  Surrreee, why not??!!  (fingers crossed)

Nancy:  OK, I’m in!  But I won’t tell my hubby just yet,  I’ll spring it on him later.

Me:  Good thinking! (I would follow suit!!)

Nancy:  Oh, by the way…I went shopping on my lunch today and bought an outfit to wear on the plane!!  SO EXCITED!!

Me: O0Oh!!  Maybe I need a new outfit, too!!

 

And so, we tweaked our hotel and air reservations and the excitement began to build even more.  Our weekend away, that started off as two days, was now almost a full week!!  WHOOOP!!

The emails began to come at a rapid rate.  There was not a day that went by where we did not talk to each other or email at least 1000 times.  OK, I exaggerate.  But it was a lot!!  And the content of the emails changed.  We were now talking about the shopping we were doing in preparation for our trip.  And Nancy had started to add cute little clip art pictures to her emails.  It was all getting very fancy!!  It was all so exciting!

What had happened to me so many times before, was happening again.  I was in the pre-vaca mode. The mode where you are giddy!!  And all a flutter.  And almost more excited than when you are actually ON the vaca!!  It’s one of the highlights of going away.  Planning and looking forward to and discussing…every.last.detail.

I looked forward to waking up to Nancy’s emails every morning.  They were very lighthearted and made me chuckle.

 3 weeks before trip…

Nancy: Hellllooooooo – I went shopping (power shopping) on my lunch hour today. Went over to Sears because Hubby buys occasionally from there for auto stuff and small yard / tools etc.  When he buys we get “shop your way rewards” points.
We had enough points built up (he doesn’t know it, he never sees the emails) so I thought I needed a new, smaller wallet for N.Y. adventure. I got a new wallet for FREE.

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two weeks before trip…

Nancy:  My list of what I am packing is attached. I looked online to see about baggage sizes. Carry on’s 22” x 17” x 9” plus one free which could fit under seat in front of you.  So I will be taking one carry-on plus one tote (it will look nice) of some sort.

one week later….

Nancy:  Went shopping on my lunch.  My old luggage just won’t work.  Bought new, larger suitcase.  Also bought new tote.  SO EXCITED!! CAN’T WAIT!!

Ten days before our trip….

Nancy:  GETTING SO EXCITED!!!  I was going through my closet last night and definitely need to back pedal on my list of items I want to take……I would need an entire trunk if I took all I wanted to take.  I do like the idea of maxi dresses with sweater or shrug to wear to plays.  Think I will go shopping!!

Nancy:  I have bought so many things that I have not shown to Hubby yet.  Will need to sneak them to your house.

One week before trip….

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Nancy:  I am SOO excited…..I cannot wait.  I went shopping again yesterday.  I cleaned out dresser drawer yesterday and now have it filled with stuff I bought to take.  I have also started to put outfits together….I have enough to stay away for three weeks.  OH, I think I am rambling. …talk to you soon.

1/2 hour later…

Nancy:  Forgot to tell you earlier…….I also bought another pair of shoes yesterday.  I think I will need a trunk for our short vacation.

 

7 days before trip….

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Nancy:  Ohhh, I’m SO EXCITED!!!  ok, For Cash – I am planning on bringing 20’s only and not 50’s. Already thought about trying to spend too large of bills. (OH, I might have to buy a thicker wallet) I will have my credit card with me. And there is always a Chase Bank near by if I need to stop and get more $$$$$$$. Will bring extra for you “just in case”.

15 minutes later…

Nancy:  I will bring drivers license (duh!!) and I always have health I.D. and my State I.D. with me, but neither of them have pictures. Will I need I.D. with picture? Of course, I also have my AARP card…..giving away age secrets.

 

Nancy:  I can hardly sleep anymore.  I’M SO EXCITED!!!!!

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A long overdue and exciting girls/sisters weekend week away  – To Be Continued…..

 

Meet The Hawks

On By Peggy BereIn Chicago, Margber2 Comments

Wednesday Feature

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Whether you’re a seasoned, hardcore hockey fan or you’ve jumped on the playoff’s bandwagon, how could you not get caught up in the excitement of Playoff Hockey?  It’s one of my favorite times of the year.  Ranking right up there with Christmas.  And, summer vacations.  I Love this team!!

Getting to know the Chicago Blackhawks

The Taxi

On By Peggy BereIn Uncategorized24 Comments

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Life moves on.

I’ve always used that statement flippantly.  An off the cuff phrase.  It has an entire new meaning to me now.  It’s deep and meaningful and a statement that is intertwined with healing and moving forward.

It’s Thursday.  That means I’m on my way to meet my very dear friend Jeri for coffee.  She’s the kind of friend anyone would be lucky to have.  Always happy.  Always smiling.  She makes me laugh.  When she walks into a room there is an energetic force that enters with her.  Everyone loves her.  I’m happy because we’ve set up a standing weekly date on Thursdays to get together to meet for coffee.  Or manicures.  Or lunch in the city.  Or just so we can talk.  And lately, I’ve been doing all the talking.  And Jeri listens.

It’s been an emotional few months.  The loss of my Mom hit me hard.  It hit all of us hard – my siblings, my kids, my nieces and nephews.  It also left a mark on my Aunts and Uncles and, well, pretty much anyone who knew her.  She was lively and young at heart and fun.  She laughed a lot.  And made you laugh.  She was someone you loved spending time with.

It’s an emotional process learning how to say goodbye to someone you love.  It’s hard to move on because there is a daily sadness that washes over you.

And Guilt.  You feel guilty just for going about your daily routine.  I guess because somewhere down deep that means that you are starting to face that fact that this cherished person is really gone.  But you don’t want to acknowledge it because that means that it really happened and that it’s not just a dream.  A bad dream that you are waiting to wake up from.  You want to hang on to every last piece of this person for as long as you can.

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There is a recurring dream that I have often.  I’ve experienced the same one repeatedly – over and over for years.  It comes to me at night when my mind is supposed to be shut down and relaxed.

I dream that I’m back at school again.  I’ve returned there in my dreams for years.  It’s never as I remember.  It’s always in a different town and with a different group of people from my life, past and present.  But, the theme is constant.  I can not remember the last time I went to class.  I can’t find my classroom or my locker.  When I finally do find my locker, I can’t remember the combination.

Somewhere towards the end – and always right before I wake up – I realize that everybody is graduating and moving on except me.

I haven’t had this recurring dream recently.   No.  It has been replaced by a different dream.  One that does not come to me at night, but one that is on my mind throughout the day.  Everyday.

I’m driving in a taxi with my mom.  I don’t know where we are but it’s in some big city.  We are riding along and suddenly the taxi pulls up to the curb and stops.  My mom turns to me, smiles and gives me a hug, opens the door and then steps out.  The taxi pulls away from the curb again.  But, I’m still in it.  I turn to look out the back window and can see my mom standing on the corner where she had gotten out.  She gets smaller and smaller until she is out of view. I can not see her anymore.  And then, she is gone.

I’m moving forward and going on with my life and she is not with me anymore.

Every now and then you get to the point where things start to make sense again.  Your routine as you once knew it feels somewhat back to normal.  Then the sadness washes over you again.  It can be set off by any small thing.  A song.  A picture.  An upcoming holiday.  A dream you have at night.  A thought during the day.

So, you surround yourself with your support system.  You spouse.  Your kids.  Your dear friends. Thursday’s with Jeri.

It’s a process.  One day at a time.

Life moves on.

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