How to become a seasoned traveler

perfect-girl

Hey!  It’s Summertime!!!   Time to take to the highways and sky-ways for travel.  Here are a few helpful tips on becoming a seasoned traveler.  You’re Welcome!

 


 Helpful Hints

 

  • Dramatically roll eyes when your fun friend suggests taking a weekend trip together while out having cocktails

  • Order another round of drinks

  • Jump on board

  • Discuss possible destinations with fun friend

  • Start small – possibly a road-trip to a neighboring state.

  • Pay the high tab from cocktails you’ve been having while discussing fun road-trip and decide to pin down destination soon.

  • Ignore work, chores, spouse, kids so you can obsess all week about where to go on fun girlfriends road trip

  • Decide a weekend is not long enough

  • Extend weekend trip to an extended long weekend road-trip.

  • Call fun friend at work to discuss extended long weekend road-trip details.

  • Scrap the idea of road-trip.  Decide to fly across the country

  • Look for good airfare

  • Pay exorbitant price for airfare

  • Book earliest flight of the day as not to miss a single minute of fun get-away.

  • Look for good hotel deal in a small, reasonably priced hotel.

  • Book a suite at a swanky hotel

  • Get disgusted at lack of weekend getaway outfits.

  • Go shopping for new wardrobe.

  • Sneak new wardrobe into house when hubby is away at work

  • Feel guilty

  • Hide new wardrobe in back of spare bedroom closet.

  • Call fun friend to discuss new weekend wardrobe

  • Get excited

  • Brilliantly decide to extend weekend road-trip to a week-long get away.  Hurray!

  • Go shopping for more clothes

  • Start obsessing about weather for fun girlfriend’s trip

  • Go shopping for comfy vacation walking shoes

  • Buy three pairs

  • Call fun friend and tell her about new, comfy walking shoes.

  • Check out vacation destination weather again

  • Worry about possible rain

  • Screw the rain.  Who cares!

  • Go shopping for new rain slicker and travel umbrella

  • Call fun friend and discuss new purchases.  And, weather.

  • Lug old suitcase up 2 weeks before trip and set it in corner of bedroom

  • Decide old suitcase is not good for fun getaway

  • Go shopping for new weekender bag

  • Call fun friend and tell her about new luggage

  • Check on vacation weather again

  • Start laying out clothes for fun girls getaway.

  • Call fun friend to ask what she is packing.

  • Over-pack

  • Unzip suitcase extender for extra room

  • Take a few things out of suitcase that you decide you don’t need.

  • Re-zip overstuffed suitcase

  • Have fun friend stay with you the night before leaving on fun friends getaway.

  • Check out vacation weather with fun friend.

  • Ask hubby to drive you to airport in the morning.

  • Worry about possible, heavy traffic on the way to airport.  And, the weather.

  • Set alarm clock for 3am to avoid being late for first flight out

  • Lug overstuffed, heavy suitcase down the stairs and out to waiting car.

  • Arrive at airport 2 hours early for first flight because there was no traffic.

  • Board airplane.

  • Get situated in seat and worry about who will be sitting with you in third open seat.

  • Avoid eye contact with boarding passengers

  • Pray for someone skinny.

  • Cough and pretend to have massive head cold as boarding passengers check out open seat.

  • Turn to fun friend in excitement as seat remains open.

  • Talk about weather at destination

  • Talk about all the fun you will have

  • Order a Bloody Mary from Flight attendant

  • Talk about how this will be the BEST TRIP EVER.

  • Land at destination.

  • Lug overstuffed suitcase out to cab

  • Wait in massively long cab line

  • Load heavy suitcase into trunk of cab

  • Swerve away from Airport and Off You Go!!

  • Arrive at Swanky Hotel.

  • Check into room.

  • Drop off luggage

  • HURRAY!   Have a GREAT fun friend getaway!!

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48 thoughts on “How to become a seasoned traveler

  1. Sure glad it’s easier for a man to take a getaway. Step 1: No plan is a good plan. Step 2: Don’t forget the beer. Step 3: Open Road. Step 4: Don’t forget Step 2. Step 5: I know I made that Reservation. I just know I did. Scrap Step 1. Step 6: Glad I didn’t forget Step 2.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Pingback: How to become a seasoned traveler (NOTED) | TRAVELING WEST JAVA - INDONESIA

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